Do you know that what is a real pain, what is the depression. I want to tell you what it is for me. He think that I am OK, I am doing everything thing, I have love but its not true most of the youths fall in depression just because of love.
When a person come in your life and make u feel special your heart beats for him you get attached to him you always want to be with him. This is the time when the problems started in your mind you don’t want him to lose, you feel insecure, therefore you do each and every effort to be close to him.
You don’t know what he has in his mind may be he will leave me or he will always be mine your mind starts assumption about his mind. You know that this time you should think positive instead being negative but you can’t do anything because we can’t stop thinking about danger.
This is what called pain. Which you have this time in your heart. He tries his best to convence you that he is with you. But still the insect of losing him crowling in your mind you know what this is just because of love.
I fall in love, I had all the feeling, I use to be very happy with him. I love him from always but this is a moment where my love is at that top where if he give me a little push I will fall down and I will die.
This is the worst thing of life that you want to say bye but she hold your hand and lock you.
My life is same I wants to kill it but my family’s love stops me from doing this. You know what you have all sense, you know that what ever you are thinking is ridiculous but still you cant stop yourself. You know the person you love the most is no longer be with you and you have to face that but you are just running away from it and make you fall in depression.
You know that what you need this time you just need a hug , you want that he just come to you and hug you hold your hand and kiss in your forehead and say ” I love you”.
This is the only medicine of your depression.
Love is ridiculous even you know that but you can’t stop your self. This is what we call love’s depression.
The fear of future
I don’t know what is happening here, where to go where to not I am confused, I am confused of what is right what is wrong in my life. This is the stage where I am with lots of emotions I have every thing every source of happiness but still I am not happy lots of thoughts in my mind I don’t know I should do some thing or I should let every thing happen. I am scared of what I will do in my future. My parents are my life, the hope they have with me, I am not doing any thing for them I wants to do but I don’t know the why. Just like all the parents they do there best for our beautiful life but am I doing any thing for them? No , every day I sleep with this question and wake up with the answer of what I need to do now, but I am still stuck in the mud, my soul is like screaming, crying to someone help me, let me the way out of here. I had big dreams but this time I am empty, I am calm from outside but inside thorns are pinching me.
I have another beautiful person in my life. He always make me feel happy, special. He love me a lot I troubled him many times but he always stay with me I love him a lot. He is the reason of my smile. He is the only person who know how to change my mind. But there all things are not healing my soul. I don’t know why these things scratching me. I think this is the fear of being lose. I am losing my dream of providing my parents a beautiful life. Yes this is a terrible fear I ever had. I had fear of loosing every thing. My mind has many questions am I right person or not, I can do any thing or not, am i good for my love ones or not, what I should do now, I am not alone why I am feeling then. I am just an stupid girl.
I want my answers i want the way.